Witty facebook status quotations

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◆ Some people should consider having multiple Facebook accounts to go along with their multiple personalities.

- 99

◆ Dear Boys, Being a dick isnt going to make yours bigger. Just saying.

- 98

◆ Roses are red, that much is true, but violets are purple, not fucking blue.

- 98

◆ Sometimes I wish I was a bird. So I could fly over certain people and shit on their heads!

- 98

◆ If people could see the face I make when I read their Facebook status updates, they would probably Unfriend me.

- 98

◆ Sure God created man before woman, but then again you always make a rough draft before creating the final masterpiece.

- 98

◆ Forget the past cause you can't change it...and forget the present...cause I didn't get you one.

- Drake98

◆ Roses are red, Facebook is blue...you look bangable, so I'll add you.

- 98

◆ So the Titanic is coming out again but in 3D...I wonder if they will see the iceburg this time...

- 98

◆ Your face is not a coloring book. Chill with the makeup!

- 98

◆ Dear google, can u just let me write my sentence before u start guessing...

- 98

◆ My internet went down yesterday. I think my neighbor forgot to pay the bill. How irresponsible...

- 98

◆ What's better Google or Yahoo???? Wait I'll google it !!!

- 98

◆ Dear Pringles, Now that I am no longer a child, I can no longer fit my hand inside your tube of deliciousness. Work on that.

- 98

◆ You can't be late until you show up.

- 98