Being drunk quotes

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◆ A female officer pulls over a drunk man. The officer tells him, Anything you say will be held against you! Then the drunk man yells, TITTIES!
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◆ Being tired is worse than being drunk, I speak my mind to much when I'm tired.
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◆ But wait guys, being drunk is cute right?
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◆ Being drunk is a beautiful thing sometimes.
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◆ When you're drunk the truth doesn't come out...you just stop being fake.
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◆ I dont make enough money to go on vacation, so I'm just going to get drunk this weekend until I dont know where I am.
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◆ My girlfriend told me to go out and get something that makes her look sexy...so I came back drunk.
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◆ Listen, I'm not an alcoholic, alcoholics go to meetings. I'm a drunk, we go to parties.
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◆ Weekend Advice: Some of lifes best lessons are learned while watching your drunk friends.
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◆ Dear alcohol, We had a deal where you would make me funnier, smarter, and a better dancer. I saw the video. We need to talk...
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◆ That awkward moment when I'm drunk and you're still ugly...
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◆ College is the only time in which being poor and drunk is acceptable.
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◆ Being drunk will never, ever, be an excuse for cheating.
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◆ Ladies, there's nothing attractive about a woman being sloppy drunk...stop bragging about it like it's an accomplishment.
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◆ Childhood is like being drunk. Everyone remembers what you did, except you.
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