Unexpected quotes

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◆ Many are the strange chances of the world,' said Mithrandir, 'and help oft shall come from the hands of the weak when the Wise falter.
- J.R.R. Tolkien100
◆ A brick could be used as a child's game to improve memory. I forgot how exactly, but then I never played much. ?
- Jarod Kintz99
◆ A brick is a rust-colored blur of movement, caught in a moment, and transformed from motion into a physical object. Studying this brick would give scientists an insight into how fast I run.?
- Jarod Kintz99
◆ A brick could be used as a measurement of time. Yes, just think how stylish you'll look with a brick duct taped to your wrist!?
- Jarod Kintz99
◆ A brick could be used to test my new levitation machine. Still, I'd rather test the machine out by seeing if it can lift my heavy, elephantine penis off the floor. But before I turn the machine on, I'm going to ask you to stand at least ten feet back, because I wouldn't want to accidentally impregnate you. ?
- Jarod Kintz99
◆ A blanket isn't the solution, a blanket is the problem. I say we burn all the blankets, along with the bodies of the unbelievers.?
- Jarod Kintz99
◆ A brick could be divided into four equal pieces and split among three friends. I'll take the two largest pieces, or half, whichever makes me appear the most generous.?
- Jarod Kintz99
◆ A blanket could be used as a tarp over one of those tiny circular inflatable pools for children. Well, you might call it a tarp, but I'd call it a trap. But I've already tried everything I can think of to silence the noisy neighbor kids, from mousetraps on lollipop sticks, to superglue disguised as lip gloss—and yet the shrieking continues.?
- Jarod Kintz99
◆ A blanket really makes the bed. Good thing too, because I never make the bed.?
- Jarod Kintz99
◆ But,instead of what our imagination makes us suppose and which we worthless try to discover,life gives us something that we could hardly imagine.
- Marcel Proust99
◆ One blanket, coupled with a fluffy pillow, could be implemented as a torture device for insomniacs.?
- Jarod Kintz99
◆ One brick is not a wall. Unless you're an ant, and then it's not only a wall, it's a building—a building that has no doors, windows, or people in the form of managers that I'd like to smash in the face with a building (or a brick).?
- Jarod Kintz99
◆ A brick could be put on the end of a scale, to determine if the other end of the scale holds a lie or the truth. (Hint: The truth is much heavier than a brick.)?
- Jarod Kintz99
◆ A blanket could be used to suppress yawns. Just curl up in the technological wonder that is a blanket, lay your head back, and let the miracle of science cure your yawns.?
- Jarod Kintz99
◆ A blanket could be used to find the Brick of Truth. Many lies will be layered on the Brick of Truth to try to cover it up, but the blanket will cover up all the lies, thus covering up the cover up and thereby revealing the Brick of Truth. And don't try to steal the covers, because the blanket will only provide warmth to the Brick of Truth. ?
- Jarod Kintz99

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