Funny gay quotes
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- 100◆ John Paulk, the poster boy for 'ex-gays' was found in a gay bar in Washington. He said he was there to use the bathroom. But nobody thought to ask him for what.
- Kate Clinton99◆ Here is a little tip for all of you. Don't come out to your father in a moving vehicle.
- Kate Clinton99◆ These ballot initiatives against same sex marriage remind us that America is the land where people are free to dream whatever they want, so long as that dream doesn't make Midwesterners feel icky.
- Lewis Black99◆ Bush proposed a constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage. Some saw the move as an attempt to preserve traditional values, while others saw it as a cynical ploy to ensure that Vice President...Cheney will never have to pay for his gay daughter's wedding.
- Jon Stewart99◆ Massachusetts became the first state to marry gay couples, though lawmakers say allowing gay couples to get married raises a lot of questions. You know, such as: does that best man invite both guys to the bachelor party?
- Jay Leno99◆ They say they're preserving 'the sanctity of marriage' which means that two gay men who've been together for twenty-five years can't get married, but a heterosexual guy can still get drunk in Vegas and marry a hooker at the Elvis chapel. The sanctity of marriage has been saved!
- Lea DeLaria99◆ Okay, yes, there is a homosexual agenda. But there's just two things on it: Number one: don't get killed. Number two: a decent brunch. That's it!
- Elvira Kurt99◆ If I wrote a National Coming Out Day card to give to my parents, it would say, 'Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a lesbian, and so is Aunt Phyllis.'
- Sabrina Matthews99◆ I spent my teen years trying to rationalize, 'All right, fine, I may be attracted to women, but I can't be a lesbian. I like Laura Ashley polished cottons, and I throw like a girl. I cry for no apparent reason. Oh my God, I'm a gay man!'
- Vickie Shaw99◆ We do not recruit. We can only impress.
- Marga Gomez99◆ I didn't choose to be gay; I was chosen. 'Are you serious? I get to be queer? Oh, thank you. I didn't even fill out the application. I am so thrilled. I bought the ticket, I scratched it off...Look, I'm a lesbian! I won!'
- Suzanne Westenhoefer99◆ If homosexuality is a disease, let's all call in queer to work. 'Hello, can't work today. Still queer.'
- 99◆ The heterosexuals who hate us should just stop having us.
- Lynda Montgomery99◆ The next time someone asks you, 'Hey, how did you get to be a homosexual anyway?' tell them, 'Homosexuals are chosen first on talent, then interview. The swimsuit and evening gown competition pretty much gets rid of the rest of them.'
- Karen Williams99
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