◆ We can see the child moving rather serenely in the uterus. The child senses aggression in its sanctuary. We see the child's mouth wide open in a silent scream.
- Dr Bernard Nathanson99
◆ There is no finer investment for any community than putting milk into babies.
- Winston Churchill99
◆ My mother says I didn't open my eyes for eight days after I was born, but when I did, the first thing I saw was an engagement ring. I was hooked.
- Elizabeth Taylor99
◆ Where do babies come from? Don't bother asking adults. They lie like pigs. However, diligent independent research and hours of playground consultation have yielded fruitful, if tentative, results. There are several theories. Near as we can figure out, it has something to do with acting ridiculous in the dark. We believe it is similar to dogs when they act peculiar and ride each other. This is called "making love". Careful study of popular song lyrics, advertising catch-lines, TV sitcoms, movies, and T-Shirt inscriptions offers us significant clues as to its nature. Apparently it makes grown-ups insipid and insane. Some graffiti was once observed that said "sex is good". All available evidence, however, points to the contrary.
- Matt Groenin99
◆ Now the thing about having a baby - and I can't be the first person to have noticed this - is that thereafter you have it.
- Jean Kerr99
◆ I can't think why mothers love them. All babies do is leak at both ends.
- Douglas Feaver99
◆ Babies don't need a vacation but I still see them at the beach. I'll go over to them and say, 'What are you doing here, you've never worked a day in your life!'.
- Stephen Wright99
◆ The kind of man who thinks that helping with the dishes is beneath him will also think that helping with the baby is beneath him, and then he certainly is not going to be a very successful father
- Eleanor Roosevelt99
◆ Father asked us what was God's noblest work. Anna said men, but I said babies. Men are often bad, but babies never are.
- Louisa May Alcott99
◆ A baby is an inestimable blessing and bother
- Mark Twain99
◆ A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it.
- Jerry Seinfeld99
◆ Babies are such a nice way to start people
- Don Herold99
◆ A baby is God's opinion that life should go on.
- Carl Sandburg99
◆ A baby will make love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, bankroll smaller, home happier, clothes shabbier, the past forgotten, and the future worth living for
- Pablo Picasso99
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