Witty proverbs

Page 4

◆ I like to spoon after I fork.

- Jarod Kintz99

◆ The man is as useless as nipples on a breastplate.

- George R.R. Martin99

◆ A technicality I'm prepared to hide wildly behind.

- Jim Butcher99

◆ Everyone has a sense of humor. If you don't laugh at jokes, you probably laugh at opinions.

- Criss Jami99

◆ I am not shy about admitting my modest talents. For example, I am happy to admit that I am better than average at clever remarks, and I also have a flair for getting people to like me. But to be perfectly fair to myself, I am ever-ready to confess my shortcomings, too, and a quick round of soul-searching forced me to admit that I had never been any good at all at breathing water. As I hung there from the seat belt, dazed and watching the water pour in and swirl around my head, this began to seem like a very large character flaw.

- Jeff Lindsay99

◆ If girlfriends were knees, I'd love to have both of mine replaced. That way, it'd be easier to run around on them.

- Jarod Kintz99

◆ This is the fast lane, folks...and some of us like it here.

- Hunter S. Thompson99

◆ Nothing so fortifies a friendship as a belief on the part of one friend that he is superior to the other.

- Honoré de Balzac99

◆ The problem with a life spent reading is you know too much.

- Josh Lanyon99

◆ Heard, Seen, and Dunn et al.

- Jarod Kintz99

◆ So just let me deal with it, I can be emotionally flawed and still love you all at the same time. I'm a great multitasker.

- Holly Hood99

◆ One must have a heart of stone to read the death of little Nell without laughing.

- Oscar Wilde99

◆ I frankly felt like the reception we received on the way in from the airport was very warm and hospitable. And I want to thank the Canadian people who came out to wave -- with all five fingers -- for their hospitality.

- George W. Bush99

◆ The guy's life drunk, I think, makes Candide look like a sourpuss. Does he even know that death exists?

- Jandy Nelson99

◆ You noticed that I wore this outfit twice? Why, the only thing you wear twice is a sour expression.

- L.M. Montgomery99