Funny proverbs

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◆ I'm sorry, if you were right, I'd agree with you.

- Robin Williams99

◆ People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.

- Isaac Asimov99

◆ I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.

- Ron White99

◆ A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

- Lana Turner99

◆ I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.

- Lily Tomlin99

◆ If it's the Psychic Network why do they need a phone number?

- Robin Williams99

◆ When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity.

- Albert Einstein99

◆ Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.

- Don Marquis99

◆ A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.

- Steve Martin99

◆ If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn't sit for a month.

- Theodore Roosevelt99

◆ Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

- Mark Twain99

◆ A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often.

- Oliver Herford99

◆ Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

- Jim Carrey99

◆ My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.

- Mitch Hedberg99

◆ I'm an idealist. I don't know where I'm going, but I'm on my way.

- Carl Sandburg99