Iq test proverbs
Page 4
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A blanket could be used to represent a thing. Now this thing is curious, because it represents an idea. This idea is called sleep, and as far as ideathings go, it's about as relaxing as it gets. Ideas within sleep are called dreams, and they are like bricks, only not real and considerably lighter and less damaging as they bounce off your skull. So if a dream is an ideaideathing, then a dream about a blanket would be an ideathingideathing, and thinking about that makes me want to crack my brainbone with a brick. ?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A brick could be used to stop people from reading my book. Just place the brick on the book's cover, to discourage people from opening it up.?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A blanket could be used to cover my couch. Nobody should see that I constructed my sofa on the bones of my ancestors.?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A blanket could be used as an American flag. It could keep the world warm with its patronizing patriotism and imperialism. ?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A brick could be used to bring about a pantsless revolution. A zipper is just a gate holding you back, man.?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A brick could be used to sell new shoes to a man with no hands. I would say a brick could be used to sell a handless man new gloves, but that's a bit of a stretch, even for a rubber band.?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A blanket could be used to make people smile. But the blanket won't make just anyone smile—it will make people with no mouths smile. I plan on showing a live audience how it works at the next Helen Keller Convention. ?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A brick could be used to brighten up your day, like a lampshade over the sun dangling down over your dining room table. You'd better apply sunscreen to your ice cream or it'll likely melt in your bedpan. ?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A blanket could be used to rob a bank. Guns are so Bonnie and Clyde, but a blanket bank robbery has a certain amount of seduction involved. A blanket has a lot more banging involved than the bang-bang of a gun.?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A blanket could be used to help my career. Things have gone cold in this economic depression, so anything to help warm things up would be most welcomed. ?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A blanket could be used to distribute ice cream to dyslexics. Blankets are cold and ice cream needs to be kept warm, right??
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A blanket could be divided into four even parts and given to three equal people. I'd be an ideal politician, because I believe in social progress.?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A blanket could be used like a cat, if it were furry and purred.?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A blanket could be used as one square on a giant checkerboard.?
- Jarod Kintz98
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