Sarcastic proverbs

Page 4

◆ I like most people as long as they're not behind a steering wheel or a keyboard.

- 98

◆ Do not touch MY iPhone. It's not an usPhone, it's not a wePhone, it's not an ourPhone. It's an iPhone.

- Ritu Ghatourey98

◆ Sometimes on Facebook, I feel like I'm just talking to a wall.

- 98

◆ My level of sarcasm is to a point where I don't even know if I'm kidding or not.

- 98

◆ If the 2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still 2?

- 98

◆ I'd kick you in the vagina but I don't wanna lose my shoe.

- 98

◆ I'm as bored as a slut on her period.

- 98

◆ I'm jealous of my parents, I'll never have a kid as cool as theirs.

- 98

◆ When people say life is short. What the hell??? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!!! What can you do thats longer?

- 98

◆ Cashier: Are you buying these? Me: No, I'm going to steal them, I just wanted to show you first.

- 98

◆ My sex life is like a Ferrari...I don't have a Ferrari.

- 98

◆ A police officer asked me where I was between 4 and 5? I said kindergarten.

- Kayla Knight98

◆ 9/11 jokes aren't funny, they're just plane wrong.

- 98

◆ Cripple jokes are so mean, I can't stand them!

- 98

◆ Yes dad, Every guy I know is my boyfriend...

- 98