Bizarre proverbs
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- Jarod Kintz99◆ Writers fish for the right words like fishermen fish for, um, whatever those aquatic creatures with fins and gills are called. ?
- Jarod Kintz99◆ I like to call in sick to work at places where I've never held a job. Then when the manager tells me I don't work there, I tell them I'd like to. But not today, as I'm sick.
- Jarod Kintz99◆ What does it mean to be the best? It means you have to be better than the number two guy. But what gratification is there in that? He's a loser—that's why he's number two.
- Jarod Kintz99◆ I want to lose weight by eating nothing but moon pies, which have significantly less gravity than earthier foods such as fruits and vegetables.
- Jarod Kintz99◆ A blanket can be wrapped around one's head and used as a helmet. It's particularly appropriate if you wear your blanket helmet during a pillow fight with me, because unbeknownst to you, I'll have a brick stuffed at the bottom of my pillowcase.?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A brick could be affixed to each end of an axle, for an example of transportation in a pre-wheel society. ?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A blanket could be used as a duvet, in the fight against elitism.?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A brick is to a blanket, as the moon is to Sun Tzu. Fear my fearlessness!?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A brick could be used as a measurement of time. Yes, just think how stylish you'll look with a brick duct taped to your wrist!?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A brick is a rust-colored blur of movement, caught in a moment, and transformed from motion into a physical object. Studying this brick would give scientists an insight into how fast I run.?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A brick could be used as a child's game to improve memory. I forgot how exactly, but then I never played much. ?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A blanket isn't the solution, a blanket is the problem. I say we burn all the blankets, along with the bodies of the unbelievers.?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A brick could be used to test my new levitation machine. Still, I'd rather test the machine out by seeing if it can lift my heavy, elephantine penis off the floor. But before I turn the machine on, I'm going to ask you to stand at least ten feet back, because I wouldn't want to accidentally impregnate you. ?
- Jarod Kintz98◆ A blanket could be used to suppress yawns. Just curl up in the technological wonder that is a blanket, lay your head back, and let the miracle of science cure your yawns.?
- Jarod Kintz98
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Bizarre proverbs, classical sentences proverbs about bizarre, proverbs for bizarre words, the best bizarre proverbs collection, motivational quotations on bizarre.
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