Passover quotes

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◆ Passover affirms the great truth that liberty is the inalienable right of every human being.
- Morris Joseph100
◆ Giving up bread for Passover is almost as awful as talking to people on gluten-free diets.
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◆ This night is different from all other nights because we actually acknowledge we're Jewish.
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◆ Apparently it's okay to massacre all firstborn children as long as it doesn't include ours.
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◆ Have a good whatever Jewish holiday it is.
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◆ Let's freak out gentiles with our incredibly weird and ominous Passover customs.
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◆ Please stop asking me whether an extra large thin-crust pizza counts as unleavened bread.
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◆ Your advancing senility is sure to add an exciting new dimension to the afikomen search.
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◆ I'm fairly certain that gefilte fish is what makes people afraid of Jews.
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◆ This is the day of Passover where I'd pretty much stab someone for a real sandwich.
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◆ My version of pornography is spending Passover week staring at cupcake boards on Pinterest.
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◆ If bread had a cell phone during Passover, I'd sext it.
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◆ I think you may be confusing Passover with the South Beach Diet.
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◆ Let's commemorate our people's freedom from 210 years of slavery by rushing through a 30-minute Seder.
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◆ Passover and Easter are the only Jewish and Christian holidays that move in sync, like the ice skating pairs we saw during the winter Olympics.
- Marvin Olasky99

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