Fun christmas quotes

◆ I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included.

- Bernard Manning100

◆ That's the true spirit of Christmas; people being helped by people other than me

- Jerry Seinfeld99

◆ There are three stages of man: he believes in Santa Claus; he does not believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus

- Bob Phillips99

◆ A Christmas shopper's complaint is one of long standing.

- 99

◆ Christmas is a time when you get homesick...even when you're home.

- Carol Nelson99

◆ The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.

- Jay Leno99

◆ Christmas is a time when everybody wants his past forgotten and his present remembered. What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.

- 99

◆ You know you''re getting old, when Santa starts looking younger.

- Robert Paul99

◆ I stopped believing in Santa Claus when my mother took me to see him in a department store, and he asked for my autograph.

- Shirley Temple99

◆ Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year.

- Victor Borge99

◆ Christmas is the season when you buy this year's gifts with next year's money.

- 99